Side Rant

I just wanted to tell the world that I am not feeling stressed about my wedding! The plans are going smoothly, and I believe we are rather on top of things. So far, at least. hehe. I am also getting an excited butterfly growing underneath my gut. Each day creeps closer to the wedding, and it gets bigger and bigger and harder to ignore. Mind you, this is an excited butterfly, not a nervous one. All the nervous butterflies can go to your gut. :P

And, by the way, who actually makes their target "wedding weight" anyways? Good grief. That's what I get for having a wedding around the holidays. And I honestly don't mind. For the first time in a long time, I've shaken the self-consciousness that has plagued me for at least 4 years.
Yes, I am a woman, and I have very seriously been embarrassed of my body. A couple of the reasons have to do with specific people, but MOSTLY the reason is called "Los Angeles." Or, specifically, the Santa Clarita Valley, that black hole that sucks away all your contentment and self-esteem. Everyone there is discontent and made out of plastic, trying in vain to purchase happiness with their credit cards. And, of course, I had the pleasure of working retail in that environment, and it honestly messed me up. For example, a co-worker at Banana Republic: probably under 5'2" WITH tall heels, altered top half (if you know what I mean), and a flat tummy. She would constantly say she was "soooo fat" and grab at her flat stomach to make it bulge a little. My body type is not that of a flat tummy (and it never will be) and I would just feel so awful hearing her say that every day. Then take all the ladies that came into the store every day wearing the clothes that I wish would look good on me, and complaining that they have to lose more weight. Oh, happy day, I do not work there or live there anymore, and I am comfortable again! It also helps to have a man that loves you for the way you are.

Rant done, commence wedding planning again. :)