Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
- Verses 1 and 2 of the Hymn "Be Still My Soul"
Words: Katharina von Schlegel, 1752. Music: Jean Sibelius, 1899
I need these words this week, and probably the next two months. More on that later, for now I can tell you that I got demoted to part time work this week, so my husband is still unemployed and I only have a part time job. Good thing Jesus is in control, and I fully believe that.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Monday, February 15, 2010
Compassion
Wikipedia defines "compassion" as a human emotion prompted by the pain of others.
I've been praying for the Lord to open up His compassion for people in my heart. In my own world of hardships, my heart had closed to those I didn't know. I could feel for people I knew, people close to me, but beyond that no sorrow touched my heart.
The world is lost without Jesus. The world is suffering... whether it is physical suffering such as starvation or disease, or whether it is inner suffering of a soul tormented by no hope. I want to care.
You might be thinking how harsh that is. How could I not care that people are hurting? How could I not want to share what has given me life, hope, assurance? I'm human, and I have learned in this life that humans are depraved (besides it being Biblical). I've hardened myself with the idea that those without Jesus just WANT it that way. I've been turned away from compassion by people trying to force Christ's rules on others, rather than sharing Christ himself. And as for the physical suffering, it was easy to pretend it didn't exist.
I have not made any huge strides in this area, but the Lord has started opening my heart at least to the suffering of the people of Haiti. Imagining having no water, food, shelter... AND no hope in a God who can save you? I don't have a lot of money or even emotional energy to commit to helping the people of Haiti, but the Lord has laid on my heart the desire to give what little I can, especially in prayer. This is new. Even though the Lord has given Corey and me very little these days, we are thriving compared to others.
The Lord has used people like Angela Fairfield and her fiery passion for the people of Haiti to open my eyes. She told me about a small orphanage in Haiti that takes in groups of siblings so they don't have to be separated. The organization is called Bosko, their website is here, and they are not only helping their orphans, but their community in the aftermath of the earthquake. It helps me to have a specific, personal group to connect with.
This post is not to guilt trip anyone into doing anything, just sharing my heart. If you happen to be interested then it's Jesus' doing, not mine.
"Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive." Colossians 3:12-13
I've been praying for the Lord to open up His compassion for people in my heart. In my own world of hardships, my heart had closed to those I didn't know. I could feel for people I knew, people close to me, but beyond that no sorrow touched my heart.
The world is lost without Jesus. The world is suffering... whether it is physical suffering such as starvation or disease, or whether it is inner suffering of a soul tormented by no hope. I want to care.
You might be thinking how harsh that is. How could I not care that people are hurting? How could I not want to share what has given me life, hope, assurance? I'm human, and I have learned in this life that humans are depraved (besides it being Biblical). I've hardened myself with the idea that those without Jesus just WANT it that way. I've been turned away from compassion by people trying to force Christ's rules on others, rather than sharing Christ himself. And as for the physical suffering, it was easy to pretend it didn't exist.
I have not made any huge strides in this area, but the Lord has started opening my heart at least to the suffering of the people of Haiti. Imagining having no water, food, shelter... AND no hope in a God who can save you? I don't have a lot of money or even emotional energy to commit to helping the people of Haiti, but the Lord has laid on my heart the desire to give what little I can, especially in prayer. This is new. Even though the Lord has given Corey and me very little these days, we are thriving compared to others.
The Lord has used people like Angela Fairfield and her fiery passion for the people of Haiti to open my eyes. She told me about a small orphanage in Haiti that takes in groups of siblings so they don't have to be separated. The organization is called Bosko, their website is here, and they are not only helping their orphans, but their community in the aftermath of the earthquake. It helps me to have a specific, personal group to connect with.
This post is not to guilt trip anyone into doing anything, just sharing my heart. If you happen to be interested then it's Jesus' doing, not mine.
"Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive." Colossians 3:12-13
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
23 Birfday Things
So yesterday was my birfday, I turned 23, and I thought a fun way to tell everyone (like the 3 people that read this) about the event would be in 23 points:
1. I still had to get up at 6am and go to work, but I got to hug my husband and hear him sleepily mumble "happy birthday, my love"
2. The toaster oven smoked a little in the morning because there was cheese on the heating element and because our place is so small, it set the smoke alarm off at 7:15am. Poor Mr. Man.
3. I wore my cream colored sweatshirt to work, and after getting in the car, promptly put my elbow right on my peanut butter toast and got peanut butter EVERYWHERE, staining the dang sweatshirt. I am never as klutzy as I am in that sweatshirt. Why is that?!
4. The sky was beautiful on the way to work... the end of the sunrise made the blanket of clouds gold and blue.
5. I made at least 2 really stupid mistakes within the first 10 minutes of work, and had to call people back and feel like a fool.
6. Our fax machine went down, and I spent almost all day on the phone with Comcast. Apparently, AT&T STOLE our fax number that we've had for 3 years. Nobody at Comcast wanted to do their job yesterday. Good grief.
7. My boss took me to Chili's for lunch because it was my birthday. I got a chicken wrap thing that was AWESOME. It's one of their new menu items. I love Chili's.
8. I left work 5 minutes late because the fax line was still down, by the end of the day it was sort of humorous, but we lost a lot of business.
9. My parents, Cathryn, and Rob (my siblings) were waiting outside of my work when I walked out to sing me happy birthday and give me balloons. :) Surprise! (we had already celebrated officially on Saturday) Note: driving with balloons in the car is very interesting.
10. They reminded me about the fact that they're still trying to find someplace that has Wii Fit in stock, and that I will get it soon (they didn't get it in time for my birthday). YAY! I have to quit Curves because we don't have the money, now I have an alternative method of exercise and fun. hehe.
11. Mr. Man called me and asked me to pick up plastic wrap and "whatever I wanted to drink with dinner" on my way home. I bought cherry coke. (We've had a little too much Dr. Pepper lately, or else I woulda chosen that)
12. The drive home must have taken a million hours longer than normal... I knew my husband had made me dinner and was waiting for me.... I kept trying not to set my romantic hopes toooo high, it was the first time he had planned something and I knew it wouldn't be elaborate. (Don't worry about that statement sounding rude to my husband, he would totally agree with me, you can ask him)
13. I walked up to the door, and Mr. Love-of-my-Life opened it with the cutest grin in the world and said "Happy Birthday" He had the table all set with candles and everything (just like I had hoped for)!
14. After I put all my stuff down he hugged me and asked me if I was hungry. I said, "not exactly yet" and he said, "me neither, lets eat!" He had planned too early for the dinner to be done because he was too excited. eeeeeeee.
15. He made gourmet bacon pasta, as I am calling it, and I was SO impressed. It had bacon, red bell pepper, green olive, and a bunch of seasonings and spices in a butter sauce. He tried extra hard to make sure it didn't have anything that could potentially hurt my tummy (there are a lot these days) and it was SO delicious. You would like it too and be just as impressed as I was. It was full of flavor. Yum.
16. He made a special playlist to play during dinner, with a bunch of our favorite romantic music.
17. He told me I wasn't allowed to do any dishes.
18. He watched Sense and Sensibility with me! The first Jane Austen that he's seen, and he paid attention the whole time and actually followed the story. You can ask him what he thought about it, I won't give it away. :) But seriously, how lucky am I?!
19. Next we ate cake (pronounced "kehk"). Our monthaversary is today, and we were instructed by our cake lady (Barbara at Valentine's Cakes) to eat our wedding cake topper for our one MONTH-aversary rather than our one year. We have plans tonight with family, so we decided to eat it for my birthday. yuuuuuuuummy.
20. We ended the evening with catching up on the most recent episode of Psych - basically our favorite show EVER. Corey always predicts the ending way ahead. Smarty pants.
21. He didn't give me a gift this year (the dinner was my gift) because of our financial situation, but the dinner and quality time together was better than any gift he's ever given me before. :)
22. The only thing I missed about past birthdays was Dr. Plew sitting down at the piano with a flourish, and leading whatever choir was in front of him at the time in a well-harmonized Happy Birthday.
23. I have the best husband in the world and while my birthday had its "everyday" moments, it was such a happy and relaxed birthday! And this blog post is pretty cheesy, but I don't care. Maybe it's 'cause of all the bad-for-me food I've had in the last 3 days. hehe.
1. I still had to get up at 6am and go to work, but I got to hug my husband and hear him sleepily mumble "happy birthday, my love"
2. The toaster oven smoked a little in the morning because there was cheese on the heating element and because our place is so small, it set the smoke alarm off at 7:15am. Poor Mr. Man.
3. I wore my cream colored sweatshirt to work, and after getting in the car, promptly put my elbow right on my peanut butter toast and got peanut butter EVERYWHERE, staining the dang sweatshirt. I am never as klutzy as I am in that sweatshirt. Why is that?!
4. The sky was beautiful on the way to work... the end of the sunrise made the blanket of clouds gold and blue.
5. I made at least 2 really stupid mistakes within the first 10 minutes of work, and had to call people back and feel like a fool.
6. Our fax machine went down, and I spent almost all day on the phone with Comcast. Apparently, AT&T STOLE our fax number that we've had for 3 years. Nobody at Comcast wanted to do their job yesterday. Good grief.
7. My boss took me to Chili's for lunch because it was my birthday. I got a chicken wrap thing that was AWESOME. It's one of their new menu items. I love Chili's.
8. I left work 5 minutes late because the fax line was still down, by the end of the day it was sort of humorous, but we lost a lot of business.
9. My parents, Cathryn, and Rob (my siblings) were waiting outside of my work when I walked out to sing me happy birthday and give me balloons. :) Surprise! (we had already celebrated officially on Saturday) Note: driving with balloons in the car is very interesting.
10. They reminded me about the fact that they're still trying to find someplace that has Wii Fit in stock, and that I will get it soon (they didn't get it in time for my birthday). YAY! I have to quit Curves because we don't have the money, now I have an alternative method of exercise and fun. hehe.
11. Mr. Man called me and asked me to pick up plastic wrap and "whatever I wanted to drink with dinner" on my way home. I bought cherry coke. (We've had a little too much Dr. Pepper lately, or else I woulda chosen that)
12. The drive home must have taken a million hours longer than normal... I knew my husband had made me dinner and was waiting for me.... I kept trying not to set my romantic hopes toooo high, it was the first time he had planned something and I knew it wouldn't be elaborate. (Don't worry about that statement sounding rude to my husband, he would totally agree with me, you can ask him)
13. I walked up to the door, and Mr. Love-of-my-Life opened it with the cutest grin in the world and said "Happy Birthday" He had the table all set with candles and everything (just like I had hoped for)!
14. After I put all my stuff down he hugged me and asked me if I was hungry. I said, "not exactly yet" and he said, "me neither, lets eat!" He had planned too early for the dinner to be done because he was too excited. eeeeeeee.
15. He made gourmet bacon pasta, as I am calling it, and I was SO impressed. It had bacon, red bell pepper, green olive, and a bunch of seasonings and spices in a butter sauce. He tried extra hard to make sure it didn't have anything that could potentially hurt my tummy (there are a lot these days) and it was SO delicious. You would like it too and be just as impressed as I was. It was full of flavor. Yum.
16. He made a special playlist to play during dinner, with a bunch of our favorite romantic music.
17. He told me I wasn't allowed to do any dishes.
18. He watched Sense and Sensibility with me! The first Jane Austen that he's seen, and he paid attention the whole time and actually followed the story. You can ask him what he thought about it, I won't give it away. :) But seriously, how lucky am I?!
19. Next we ate cake (pronounced "kehk"). Our monthaversary is today, and we were instructed by our cake lady (Barbara at Valentine's Cakes) to eat our wedding cake topper for our one MONTH-aversary rather than our one year. We have plans tonight with family, so we decided to eat it for my birthday. yuuuuuuuummy.
20. We ended the evening with catching up on the most recent episode of Psych - basically our favorite show EVER. Corey always predicts the ending way ahead. Smarty pants.
21. He didn't give me a gift this year (the dinner was my gift) because of our financial situation, but the dinner and quality time together was better than any gift he's ever given me before. :)
22. The only thing I missed about past birthdays was Dr. Plew sitting down at the piano with a flourish, and leading whatever choir was in front of him at the time in a well-harmonized Happy Birthday.
23. I have the best husband in the world and while my birthday had its "everyday" moments, it was such a happy and relaxed birthday! And this blog post is pretty cheesy, but I don't care. Maybe it's 'cause of all the bad-for-me food I've had in the last 3 days. hehe.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Comfy
So we've almost been married for 1 month, and I have officially picked one word that describes our marriage so far: "comfy..."
... or "comfortable" if you prefer a more formal vocabulary word. But I think the informality of the word "comfy" is exactly the point. And it looks cute typed out.
Of course, not everything is comfy. Our financial situation is anything but comfy. Corey's lack of job is not comfy. Our little house has some comfy points, but the little sink is not comfy... the lack of doors is not comfy... the neighbors are not comfy...
But us? We are comfy. Comfy in our love and trust for each other. Comfy in the Lord's sovereignty over our future. Comfy getting to hug each other as long as we want. Comfy visiting family together. Comfy praying together. Comfy laughing at having frozen pizza and mac 'n cheese over and over.
*Sigh* - cause that's a comfy sound.
... or "comfortable" if you prefer a more formal vocabulary word. But I think the informality of the word "comfy" is exactly the point. And it looks cute typed out.
Of course, not everything is comfy. Our financial situation is anything but comfy. Corey's lack of job is not comfy. Our little house has some comfy points, but the little sink is not comfy... the lack of doors is not comfy... the neighbors are not comfy...
But us? We are comfy. Comfy in our love and trust for each other. Comfy in the Lord's sovereignty over our future. Comfy getting to hug each other as long as we want. Comfy visiting family together. Comfy praying together. Comfy laughing at having frozen pizza and mac 'n cheese over and over.
*Sigh* - cause that's a comfy sound.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Hunt-hood
Well, here it is.... that blog post that you've all been waiting for....
I'M MARRIED!!!!!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
But seriously though, I was married to Corey James Hunt on January 9th, 2010, at 2pm in Grass Valley, CA. It was an absolutely beautiful and fun wedding, and I don't think I'm biased. I could not wipe the smile off my face, and I mean that literally. The photographers kept telling me to look serious for some pictures and my face would NOT go serious. It was rather comical. I am looking forward to the pictures from Aric and Casey Photography, they have already posted two pictures that make me quite giddy. If you follow their blog or be-fan them on facebook, you can see them too. :) I had the most amazing time at my wedding with all of our friends! Everywhere I turned I wanted to hug somebody. Our wedding party was THE BEST, and our parents were glowing. I wish I could have captured the feeling of that day in a bottle and revisit it every day.
If you were to ask me what was the best part of the day, I could give you 10 different answers, so I will just highlight a couple of my favorite parts. :)
Oh, and yes, Mom and Pop Hunt gave us a new car!! Her name is Jane and she is a green 2-door 2000 Honda Accord and she's BEAUTIFUL. My favorite thing about her right now is that she doesn't leak in the rain like all of our other cars. :) We walked out of the reception to see our other car (aptly named The Legend as it came from Phil Clark and it's an Acura Legend) decorated rather... strangely. Before we could move towards it, friends of ours (Troy and Melody almost-Rankin) ran up and climbed in and sped off. Then our bridal party ran up to the car that was parked behind it and decorated it really fast while Pop said something I don't remember because of the shock! Something like he loves us and... happy car! :)
Corey and I drove off, and headed for South Lake Tahoe for a week of wonderfulness. The weather was beautiful (I took way too many pictures) and we had so much fun. We took a ride on the gondola at Heavenly resort at Stateline which was AMAZING. We went ice-skating, Corey's first time, and of course he's a natural at it. Crazy man. We went snow-shoeing which was nice but we are going cross-country skiing next time. :) We played video games, watched movies, had a snow fight, went to a fancy dinner... and then came home.
Now it's back to the grind, but our happiness has not decreased. I'm back to work, but Corey lost his job the Monday before our wedding, so now he's spending his days looking for a job and running errands for us. We have mostly moved into our little place (and it's MUCH little-r with 2 of us and all our stuff) and I will take pictures when I can finally finish cleaning everything.
What I'm looking forward to:
I'M MARRIED!!!!!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
But seriously though, I was married to Corey James Hunt on January 9th, 2010, at 2pm in Grass Valley, CA. It was an absolutely beautiful and fun wedding, and I don't think I'm biased. I could not wipe the smile off my face, and I mean that literally. The photographers kept telling me to look serious for some pictures and my face would NOT go serious. It was rather comical. I am looking forward to the pictures from Aric and Casey Photography, they have already posted two pictures that make me quite giddy. If you follow their blog or be-fan them on facebook, you can see them too. :) I had the most amazing time at my wedding with all of our friends! Everywhere I turned I wanted to hug somebody. Our wedding party was THE BEST, and our parents were glowing. I wish I could have captured the feeling of that day in a bottle and revisit it every day.
If you were to ask me what was the best part of the day, I could give you 10 different answers, so I will just highlight a couple of my favorite parts. :)
- Our "first look," when Mr. Man and I saw each other for the first time. Casey and Aric had me creep up behind a corner, it was sort of cold and I was kind of tense from the anticipation. I was standing behind the wall, and I could see his shadow. I think I called out "are you ready?" just so I could hear his voice. I walked around to see my almost husband all decked out with eyes shining at me, and I thought I wouldn't be able to walk up to him. Somehow I made it there, and we just put our heads together and held on for dear life. (one of the pictures already up is of this moment). We stood there forEVER (or what seemed like it) just trying to gain some stability. The first thing out of his mouth was "You look amazing." :)
- Eating lunch before the wedding with the bridal party and laughing with all of them... and randomly squealing.
- Walking down the aisle with my beloved father, who leaned over and said "You look great in white, did I ever tell you that?" (quote from That Thing You Do and a Jim-ism)
- Hugging my grandparents so tight.
- Walking into the reception past so many people that I was SO excited to see.
- The fact that Cathryn caught a part of my bouquet. (There was a main part and 2 single roses)
- Dad's speech, Jenny's speech, and Turtle's speech.
- Yelling as we were running out to leave, "I didn't get to hug my mom!!" haha!
- The way that the bridal party planned the get away, and how awesomely fast they decorated the new car (! see below)
Oh, and yes, Mom and Pop Hunt gave us a new car!! Her name is Jane and she is a green 2-door 2000 Honda Accord and she's BEAUTIFUL. My favorite thing about her right now is that she doesn't leak in the rain like all of our other cars. :) We walked out of the reception to see our other car (aptly named The Legend as it came from Phil Clark and it's an Acura Legend) decorated rather... strangely. Before we could move towards it, friends of ours (Troy and Melody almost-Rankin) ran up and climbed in and sped off. Then our bridal party ran up to the car that was parked behind it and decorated it really fast while Pop said something I don't remember because of the shock! Something like he loves us and... happy car! :)
Corey and I drove off, and headed for South Lake Tahoe for a week of wonderfulness. The weather was beautiful (I took way too many pictures) and we had so much fun. We took a ride on the gondola at Heavenly resort at Stateline which was AMAZING. We went ice-skating, Corey's first time, and of course he's a natural at it. Crazy man. We went snow-shoeing which was nice but we are going cross-country skiing next time. :) We played video games, watched movies, had a snow fight, went to a fancy dinner... and then came home.
Now it's back to the grind, but our happiness has not decreased. I'm back to work, but Corey lost his job the Monday before our wedding, so now he's spending his days looking for a job and running errands for us. We have mostly moved into our little place (and it's MUCH little-r with 2 of us and all our stuff) and I will take pictures when I can finally finish cleaning everything.
What I'm looking forward to:
- Learning how to use my awesome kitchen gear! Thanks everyone! Current biggest excitement (and I'm not sure why) is the bread maker.
- Coming home to a loving man every evening.
- Saturday. And the next Saturday.
- Corey gaining employment.
- Being able to finally get to all those official offices and change my name (I'll have to get off work)
- The rest of my life!!
Monday, December 28, 2009
Happiness
Well I hope you had a beautiful Christmas. I sure did. It is absolutely amazing to be a part of two families at once. I get to enjoy each family for its uniqueness, but also the unifying love of Jesus we all share. I got to have two Christmas mornings on Christmas day, both concentrating on the fact that we were celebrating Jesus' Birthday, or more specifically, the fact that He came to earth to save our sin-sick souls. I had a wonderful time giving presents to the families that I love, eating food that my stomach hated, playing games with Dad, helping Mom in the kitchen (yes, you should be proud), watching Pop get more excited than I ever remember being at 6am, Mom Cindy's excited face when all of her kids gasped upon opening their HDTVs... it all amounted to love. I experienced more love this Christmas than I have in a long time.
I'm fairly certain that the reason that I had an awesome Christmas filled with love was not because I got awesome gifts, or even that I have a fiance, but because Jesus is re-opening my heart. Life sucks, to be blunt, and my heart has only had a shallow opening to its shell for the last 5 years, hardened by bitterness, anger, pessimism, pain, and hopelessness. Thankfully, Jesus helped Corey to find that shallow opening 2 1/2 years ago, and He has been using Mr. Man to melt the walls. Now, after leaving the environment that was encouraging my heart to be hard, the walls are melting much faster, allowing me to love more, be loved, and be filled with the joy of the Lord again.
I'm fairly certain that the reason that I had an awesome Christmas filled with love was not because I got awesome gifts, or even that I have a fiance, but because Jesus is re-opening my heart. Life sucks, to be blunt, and my heart has only had a shallow opening to its shell for the last 5 years, hardened by bitterness, anger, pessimism, pain, and hopelessness. Thankfully, Jesus helped Corey to find that shallow opening 2 1/2 years ago, and He has been using Mr. Man to melt the walls. Now, after leaving the environment that was encouraging my heart to be hard, the walls are melting much faster, allowing me to love more, be loved, and be filled with the joy of the Lord again.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Side Rant
I just wanted to tell the world that I am not feeling stressed about my wedding! The plans are going smoothly, and I believe we are rather on top of things. So far, at least. hehe. I am also getting an excited butterfly growing underneath my gut. Each day creeps closer to the wedding, and it gets bigger and bigger and harder to ignore. Mind you, this is an excited butterfly, not a nervous one. All the nervous butterflies can go to your gut. :P
And, by the way, who actually makes their target "wedding weight" anyways? Good grief. That's what I get for having a wedding around the holidays. And I honestly don't mind. For the first time in a long time, I've shaken the self-consciousness that has plagued me for at least 4 years.
Yes, I am a woman, and I have very seriously been embarrassed of my body. A couple of the reasons have to do with specific people, but MOSTLY the reason is called "Los Angeles." Or, specifically, the Santa Clarita Valley, that black hole that sucks away all your contentment and self-esteem. Everyone there is discontent and made out of plastic, trying in vain to purchase happiness with their credit cards. And, of course, I had the pleasure of working retail in that environment, and it honestly messed me up. For example, a co-worker at Banana Republic: probably under 5'2" WITH tall heels, altered top half (if you know what I mean), and a flat tummy. She would constantly say she was "soooo fat" and grab at her flat stomach to make it bulge a little. My body type is not that of a flat tummy (and it never will be) and I would just feel so awful hearing her say that every day. Then take all the ladies that came into the store every day wearing the clothes that I wish would look good on me, and complaining that they have to lose more weight. Oh, happy day, I do not work there or live there anymore, and I am comfortable again! It also helps to have a man that loves you for the way you are.
Rant done, commence wedding planning again. :)
And, by the way, who actually makes their target "wedding weight" anyways? Good grief. That's what I get for having a wedding around the holidays. And I honestly don't mind. For the first time in a long time, I've shaken the self-consciousness that has plagued me for at least 4 years.
Yes, I am a woman, and I have very seriously been embarrassed of my body. A couple of the reasons have to do with specific people, but MOSTLY the reason is called "Los Angeles." Or, specifically, the Santa Clarita Valley, that black hole that sucks away all your contentment and self-esteem. Everyone there is discontent and made out of plastic, trying in vain to purchase happiness with their credit cards. And, of course, I had the pleasure of working retail in that environment, and it honestly messed me up. For example, a co-worker at Banana Republic: probably under 5'2" WITH tall heels, altered top half (if you know what I mean), and a flat tummy. She would constantly say she was "soooo fat" and grab at her flat stomach to make it bulge a little. My body type is not that of a flat tummy (and it never will be) and I would just feel so awful hearing her say that every day. Then take all the ladies that came into the store every day wearing the clothes that I wish would look good on me, and complaining that they have to lose more weight. Oh, happy day, I do not work there or live there anymore, and I am comfortable again! It also helps to have a man that loves you for the way you are.
Rant done, commence wedding planning again. :)
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